Little words by little me

Totally Xangafied...
Yeah, I've gone over to the darkside.

I still check out my LJ but I totally do xanga: www.xanga.com/theljlova

And I have also stepped over into "myspace". Sad, I know. But I wanted to keep in touch with Randy from the Dreamcenter. www.myspace.com/aslovelyasme

Do you still remember me?
Because I miss you everday...
My heart is broken
My heart won't heal
Every lie
I still loved you
Every sin
I still cared
Again and again people leave
And again and again
I remember and still
Miss you...

Kiss Kiss Kiss Kiss me love
It was my first. First time to ever kill a live creature. I'm talking a LIVING THING. I was driving on 20 and the pigeon wouldn't move out of my lane! I swear its significant other had just left them, it was so dazed and confused. And then I saw it explode in my rear-view mirror.

As I type, Sarah comes into the office with tears. Her and Saphraine just committed the sickest act ever. A long time ago Raine took the burden of taking care of two mice which she named Tinker and Bell. One week Sarah took care of them and Bell came back an obese mouse. The longer and longer we had them the less and less Raine fed them, but they seemed content as long as I made sure they had water and food once a week. But when Rocco started slicing and dicing Bell during the night, we realized we had a problem. So we tried to take more time and effort to feed them and shoo Rocco everytime he attacked. Well, tonight I found a pretty disturbing scene. Rocco isn't the only one who was trying to get Bell, Tinker decided she wanted in on some of the action and dug right on in. Bell was completely torn to pieces! So Saphraine begged Sarah to throw the carcass AND the live mouse over the creek. Sarah said Tinker flailed and tumbled in the air with the carcass behind. Has anyone ever killed an innocent creature? I don't think this counts as tormenting small animals as a child, this is an outrage if you ask me!

Current Mood: indescribable
Current Music: Dust In The Wind

Lips are turning blue
I hate when people make YOU feel bad for their mistakes.

I had a great bday. I must thank Sarah, JoJo, Carol, and Logan for a splendid time! I thought class on my bday would ruin things, but not when Madonna, whipped cream, and pedicures are involved. Kinky enuff for you?

I hate when people make up excuses.

I got my conch pierced. Is that how you spell it? The left side of my head is swollen and pounding. The pain isn't half as bad as it was when I got my septum. C-Stone+septum piercing=PAIN

I hate when people try to change the past.

I saw Stepford Wives. I gotta say, it was disapointing. Why would you take a classical thriller and remake it into a longer than needed, hi-tech suspense? The ending destroyed everything.

I hope this weekend goes by slowly. I don't wanna work on Mon.

I hate when people suck you into their drama.

Lips are turning blue
A kiss that can't renew
I only dream of you
My beautiful

How did they become so naive?
noahdapimp123: Yeah Yeah Yeah's awful
noahdapimp123: dunno Modest Mouse
noahdapimp123: coldplay should die
noahdapimp123: no the scientist song
noahdapimp123: *cough* die
noahdapimp123: i liked the video though
noahdapimp123: except the whole music part . . .

Art? Beauty? Talent? Does it mean nothing?
I am gonna have a panic attack in a second...

Save me.

Current Mood: sore
Current Music: Muse - Sing For Absolution

This ones for you, Mr Kung-Fu-Master *SINGS* KARATE CHOP THEM
Yeah, for those of you who don't listen to Budweiser commercials, I was ripping them off, and "Raine" (aka Saph aka Saphraine) said to say "Mr Kung Fu Master" 'cuz I couldn't remember any of the people they sing/talk about.

In other news,
I will be 18 in 4 days. Olivia is happy to tell me I can buy cigarrettes, Meredith informed me I could buy lottery tickets and Logan was ever so kind to announce I can buy porn. We all know that'll be my weakness...<--- sarcasim

I'm sad though. For many reasons...growing up, graduating, having to be responsible (ha). But I'm REALLY sad that my brother and sister are going to be at camp. Waaa?!?! First bday they'll miss of mine, since they were born. *sniff* Someone hold me.

Drama Dust is recording this month, w00t. Some new stuff, some remix, and ooh so much fun. Recording is my favorite thing to do in the whole world, and play with Rocco.

Who's Rocco you ask? He's my baby! An early bday present from my papa. A sweet little 8 week old kitten. I love him. He was one of Billie's (Isaac's cat) kittens! So I've known him since day one. Aww!

Well, there's your update, stop whining.

<3 everyone of you (Jordan's fav symbol)

Current Mood: exhausted
Current Music: Just the budweiser theme, haha

Lets copy my little sister
Cold light, hot night
Be my heater be my lover
And we could do it to each other

Cold light, hot night
Be my heater be my lover
And we can do it to each other

Go go go go go
Hey oh

Ride daddy ride
Ride out the tide
I’d rather die
Then hear goodbye
And watch you go
Go go go go
Hey oh

Ride daddy ride
Ride out the tide
I’d rather die
Then hear goodbye
And watch you go
Go go go go
Hey!

Cold light, hot night
Be my heater be my lover
And we could do it to each other
Yeah we could do it to each other
Were like a sister and a brother

Go go go go go
Hey hey huh
Uhhh

Ride momma ride
Ride out the tide
I’d rather die
Then hear goodbye
And watch you go

I've had a terrible week, but its getting better.

Do you know who gives the best hugs? Like 10 out of 10, the best of the best? Michael. I'm so glad we kissed and made up. =) Don't worry love, I'm not stealing your man.

I missed Jordan a lot today, but it was like after 9pm when I finally said it and it was too late to call (or at least Corin said so). I wish Carol and Chelsea had come to youth, it was the best.

Man, I have to tinkle. Freakin-a!

Current Mood: grateful
Current Music: Yeah Yeah Yeah's "Cold Light"

Boom boom oh you look so sexy
You know what song is FINALLY on the radio? "I'm still in love with you boy" with Sean Paul and Sasha. I WANNA COVER IT! I wanna cover every song...in other news...

Two weeks left of school. I'm happy. I'll probably take a summer semester just to get some stuff over with (like math, YUCK). We're leaving for GMA on Saturday so I have all my teachers bending over backwards to help me keep up while I'm OOT. =oD It looks like I'll have 2 A's and one B++. Hehe.

The Swap called my dad back today after watching the video. They say we are great and perfect for TV...so that means we're screwed up? They are going to air one season and if all works out, they'll come and expose my family and the Zany Aguirre's.

I'm sweating as I type in the office. This place needs a freakin AC.

I really miss Sarah from Keller and all the Power chicks. =( Come back to me my darlings!

Oh, GMA should be fun: Olivia, Michelle, my dad...and me. W00t.

Come and see Drama Dust, we're playing a lot. www.dramadust.com

Well I've done it...
I've totally made the next few months of my life hell before I save up enough money to get my own car and *hopefully* my own place to live...that is of course if I'm not locked up in a retardation house by then.

I don't if I am actually slow or if I'm just a complete moron who can't figure anything out.

The funniest part for me the whole night is, the huge crowd that surrounded me as I was tearing my bumper off, quickly disappeared when I got out of my car staring at what I had just done. Paul, you are the only one who cares.

I'm sorry Zach for making tonight such a drag, but trust me, it can't be half as worse as mine has been and will be for a long, long time. My family may seem "cool" from the outter eye, but I will have long after effects from tearing off my dad's front bumper.

I doubt I'll be able to drive anywhere other than work and school in his car.

I doubt I'll get it fixed before pay day.

I doubt if I get a car before I'm 21.

I doubt they'll ever let me live it down.

I really wish sometimes I had just never been born or flew over that median and blown up like that 16 year old boy did in my car wreck before Thanksgiving. Unless you are terribly bleeding or severly mangled, you better have a good reason for screwing up in my household.

I can't believe going 1.5 mph and hitting a hitch tore the whole front bumper off and forced the bottom of the car to drop. I'm like in complete awe.

If I get one freakin pitty comment I'll delete it. I'm just venting and really wish I had somewhere to run tonight. Instead, I'll go cry myself to sleep since Saphraine isn't here to comfort me.

I hope we'll be able to make it to our shows this weekend, its the only times I can get away from myself.

Current Mood: Crying
Current Music: Stupid girl

Krazy days
So today we started a "Zoo Run Run" group for April 24th. https://www.signmeupsports.com/events/register.asp?eventid=23682&origin=e

If you want to be part of the "Picnic Patrols" school group, email me and let me know! We have to get everyone registered and paid by April 9th...

Noah wants to see the penguins, but they are in San Antonio in Sea World, so we're going to take a SMALL group of people down to San Antonio in say...July? I think we've already filled up the cars. Haha. If you want to join the trip, get a car, wad of cash, and a responsible driver and again, email us.

Drama Dust has been getting a lot of good response, we have a bunch of shows coming up, we're excited! Keep checking the site out for updates-- www.DramaDust.com

I'm graduating May uhh...I forget what the exact date is, but its soon! W00t!

I made an "A" on my math test, I'm so happy. Anita was like FREAKIN OUT! I feel SO happy seeing her at school, it makes me feel like I have someone there.

I hope you guys are happy for updating, who knows when I'll have time to do it again...

Tease me, please me

Current Mood: productive
Current Music: "Day Is Done" by Norah Jones

Here you go so stop whining!
Everyone keeps telling me to update my journals. I'm sorry if I don't sit around and think of things to do all day. *muah* Love you!

But I do like Carol's journal play (diaryland.com or sumfin). I can't ever keep up with these two, let alone a third!

Drama Dust is playing around, we have haters and lovers! *rawrr* Have 3 songs on Pure Volume! www.dramadust.com

I have so much to do, but I'm on the computer doing this. Why? I don't know...

Tonight Sarah and JoJo went to California so I sent them off with a star giftbag filled with Cashews (for Sarah), Jellybeans (for JoJo), and beef jerky for them to share on the plane. I miss them already. =(

Carol and I have found time to hang out again, so we chilled for a couple of hours. I think her dad got aggravated with me. =/ Sorry Dick! I hope Carol and I can hang out on Saturday. I'm glad to have her in my life, even though we've had a few blackouts.

Well, off to do something more interesting then acting like I'm talking to someone.

~Sprinkle me with your Dust Joey~

Current Mood: irritated
Current Music: "Sweater Song" by Weezer

Go Move Forward Advance
So we are in the studio this week! Fun stuff. If you haven't already, check us out at: www.dramadust.com

Its hot. We've got some shows coming up!

School is krazy, work is busy, Drama Dust is busy. Everythings just going strong!

Current Mood: hyper
Current Music: Pharrell "Frontin"

Friday - 1/09/04
Our site is up! www.dramadust.com

Fusco ever so kindly invited us to open up for them this Friday. Thats awesome. We've gotten 3 shows this year without even breaking a sweat. So thats pretty kool.

Tomorrow I'm going in to take my math test for Community College, signing up for this semester. I'm going to be SO busy!!!

I hope to see you guys at the show, I know its far. =(

Current Mood: anxious

Thanks for nothing
Everyone says "It was incredible" we also heard "You guys did really well" "Totally diff band from Chelsea's house to tonight" "40's with a twist of rock" "Jazz with a twist of alternative" It goes on and on...everyone says we did great.

Thanks to those of you who SAID you would be there and weren't.

Thanks for those of you who freakin took up the 2 spots in the car and then didn't show up, so Derica, Rachel, and Silvia didn't have a ride.

Thanks to Joe, KD, Andy, the Hendersons and the Asbills for being the true friends we needed tonight. We love you guys, thanks for supporting us!

Thanks for those of you who were there in spirit (Jordy, Sarah, JoJo, and Chels).

Current Mood: Krazazy
Current Music: "Cold, Cold, Night" by Meg White

Dramadust first "official" show
Friday, Jan 2nd
Club Red Letter - $7
Fusco and VLY with opening act Dramadust (or us)
Starts at 8pm

Come or I will hunt you down and kill you with my 2 bare hands.

We are on about 8:30. If you haven't gotten a call, be expecting one.

After 4 hours of practice today I'm off to see Eisely at Trees. Later!

Current Mood: excited

Drama drama drama
So the day after Christmas (Friday) Jordan and Tyler came in town. I was in McAllen so when I came home Sat night I walked into Chili's looking like road kill and see 2 curly haired hotties with Chels and Saphraine. I cried, squealed and hugged. It was very nice having them here, but I think I enjoyed our time with them in VA, free of drama and annoying people.

All this week has been is drama. I can't handle it anymore.

I don't want to have anything to do with your life and drama.

Tomorrow Sarah, JoJo, Dan and I are going to see "Eisley" at Trees. It'll be fun. I already bought the tickets so I REALLY hope JoJo can go! If not I guess we'll have to invite one of many people we don't want there. Sarah, JoJo and I have fun, we can screw around, laugh and play and not worry about drama.

I've had less than 24 hours of sleep in 6 days, and I'm starting to feel it.

Tonight I watched Jeepers Creepers 2 and Alex and Emma. I loved Alex and Emma, Jeepers Creepers was a lame teen horror flic, but you gotta love them.

I can't wait to graduate, move out and live my own life. I wanna go somewhere away from this mess, away from obligations and free to choose I hang out with and when. Even if thats at 2am!

I don't understand why someone signs on AIM and asks you how you are. When you say "Kinda pissed off" or "Annoyed" why do they ask "Why?" >:( Doesn't that make you a bit MORE irritated? *screams*

Current Mood: irritated

self pity
I have been freakin tired of feeling like no ones there for me these days. JoJo and Jordan seem to be all in love, I don't remember them saying more than 'hello' when he lived here. Sarah is always at work. Chels has her own friends. And that leaves me with an obsessive guy and a bunch of people that wait for me to call.

Christmas was good, family came over, went ot Stephs...got a class ring and a Playstation 2...among other things.

I feel like watching "A Nightmare B4 Christmas" and having an excuse to cry.

My feet are cold 'cuz I was tired of wearing these hottt tights that are a bit too small.

I wish Steph would call so I can go to her house and bitch about all my friends that suck, or the lack of.

Current Mood: bummed
Current Music: "Shake it like a polaroid picture" - Outkast

A brand new car!
Well, not -brand new-...but I might be getting a car! Its a '91 volvo, CD player, '93 engine. Its ok. Hehe. Not like my dream car, but it'll work for a few months until I can buy a kool one! It'll be awesome to be a little more independent again. =) I have to clean up my room 'cuz "Unforsaken" has 2 of the girlfriends stayin this week. Its a MESSSSS! But I'm also suppose to be dying my hair and getting ready for my works Christmas party tonight. Krazy! Terri let me borrow this really kool purple sweater to wear with my black dress I wore for Isha's wedding. I have nooo idea what shoes I'm wearing. Haha. My back and neck really hurt today. I dunno why. I have to take some Defensive Driving Class to get the car wreck off my driving record. Spring semester I'm taking Drama, Hip-hop dance, and Math at Mountain View. Its going to be SO much fun! Because I had a 4.0 the last semester I finished, I can take as many classes I want. Last time I went to Community College, I went to Cedar Valley. So I dunno if I wanna go to Mountain View or not, but they have the Hip-Hop class I want. Hehe. Well, there's a lot of drama and my rooms still a mess so I'm going to clean up. If you have nothing to do tonight, check out "Comrade" at the Door in Dallas tonight! (www.comrademycomrade.com)

Current Mood: In pain
Current Music: nothing

Its ghetto goth
Don't we have a label for everything these days? My nose will not stop running I'm about to shoot sumfin. We can't sleep, its turkey day, happy happy joy joy. I hate these holidays, everyone stuffs themselves and I can't get down more than one serving of everything. Damn grazers! Tonight Sarah, Saphraine, and I decided to do the "gothic look". Not that we had anywhere to go. (See the picture) Sezzy mama's? Is the moon like freakin in line with earth? I sat for an hour searching through lj to find a "hot guy" and failed miserably. I forgot to check out the boys in tight pants, dammit! They're all gay anyways. Well, I am off to entertain Sarah until we finally go to bed. Don't sin too much tomorrow. It IS a 7 Deadly Sin.

Current Mood: aggravated
Current Music: "Cinnamon Spider" - Jack Off Jill

Blah blah blah
See what happends when I don't work? I have all this freakin time to write entries.

I am all like pissy right now. I'm pissed off 'cuz I feel like I've only had one real friend during all this shit. Everyone else gives me a hug and says "Aww" but Sarah is the only one who has gotten off her ass and seen a movie with me, or let me follow her around all day while she goes to school and gets a job. But I keep calling people to just keep my mind of things, but they don't call me back or they aren't home or they can't do anything. I just don't wanna mope around and think about the accident, I wanna move on. And I'm like pissed 'cuz 2 of my best friends who I'm always fucking there for haven't talked to me more than 5 min the past week and don't seem to care. Its freakin Thanksgiving break, we should be hanging out! And I've called them over and over again and its like I'm just one of those backups for when their "best friends" fucking fall through. I hate it.

I just feel so lonely sometimes. And I know I shouldn't, I know God's going "Hello, I'm here", but I just miss him and wish he wasn't such an ass. Get a freakin spine you moron.

I'm going to go watch a movie and cry.

Oh and guess who is going to spend the next week with me? Sarah! Damn I need to buy her sumfin nice for being here.

Current Mood: bitchy
Current Music: Are You Lonesome Tonight - Norah Jones

Concussions and dislocated jaws
So today I went to the doctor. She said I have a concussion and ordered a CT scan to make sure everythings ok...I hate CAT scans. I had one like 7 years ago, they scared me then and so all the fears came back. But I acted brave and squeezed my eyes shut.

While they were looking at my brain, Sarah was at the dentist checking out her jaw, and she has a dislocated jaw!!! Isn't that horrible? I feel so bad. I guess the Doc said normally you haffta get surgery and stuff, but her's is healing itself! I swear, this has all been God.

Lol, we're putting an ad in the newspaper to see if anyone witnessed the accident so my dad is telling us all not to answer the phone...he says "We don't want to get any whacko's". I have a citation since no one "saw" the bus and this damn guy who stopped to see if we're ok said he saw it and I got his phone number. But now he's saying he didn't see the bus.

They made me take out my piercings for the CT scan and I can't get my freakin septum back in. So I have this freakin 20 gage in right now, but I normally wear a 12. =(

I just want my pain killers so I can sleep!

Current Mood: anxious

My neck, my back, my *coughs*
Like the wound? I hope so, I think the pic will only be up for a short period of time. I don't like it much. Makes me hurt. You should see my legs! They are getting worse and worse everyday. I swear anytime I'm working for Riley there's is so much anxiety and frustration from agent to agent. Not a very nice working enviroment. My job at Kindred is being SO awesome about this. They said I can take the whole week off if I want, but I kinda need money to BUY a new car. Today I'm going to the doctors around 2, so I have an excuse to not go in, hopefully I can at least get on or two more days in. But Thanksgiving is Thurs, isn't that a krazy thought? I still think reality is trying to settle in but I keep avoiding it by keeping me busy. I dream about the wreck and laughing about it like it means nothing to me.

On a good note, I spent the night at Sarah's on Sunday. She's been job hunting for months and I forced her to put a job application in at the theatre since I had seen a wanted ad on Thurs. But she whined and complained. Monday she put an application in, a few hours later while we were at the store the theatre called back to set up an interview. When we got back, she called the theatre and he wanted to have an interview that night! So she was all freakin out, I was excited as hell 'cuz I'd been praying like a maniac that she would get a quick call back if it was the job for her. That night she got a job!!! =) Is that not awesome or what? So, I met Fusco (nicer than I was expecting, haha, if they're reading this, I love you guys!), totalled my car, hung out with Casey and Carrie, and Sarah got a job. She'll probably be spending Thanksgiving with me, since her family is going to see Rex tomorrow for the holiday. My dad wants to have a "meeting"...

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